Last week, my staff discovered eight mice in my attic over a span of seven days. One was actually discovered near the television in my room, that is only 6 footsteps away from my bed. Yes only SIX!!

I was panicking when I was apprised of the first sighting, frantically pacing the family room and collecting as many people as I could to empty out my room and check every inch and every corner. Baby A watched with concerned eyes and innocent questions as his mother behaved hysterical.

Next morning he refused to enter my room alone, he suddenly needed assistance even to pee.

How could I forget I have magical powers and can impose my fears on my sons’ mind in a matter of a few seconds. While I was still feeding my younger one, A Junior, I saw a cat in our garden and casually made a statement to my maid to not leave Junior’s things outdoor. Baby A refused to venture out because I was unable to give him a satisfactory explanation what the feline could do to junior.

My brave husband, Mr. K runs a ‘No Fear’ campaign around the children. He has managed to make both of them adventurous enough to try out different things without fear. Baby A fearlessly jumped into the pool at 12 months and now he is a self taught underwater swimmer at 4.5 years. Mr. K overcame his own reluctance to be around animals in view of our son’s apparent attraction to dogs. Now we are the proud parents of a golden retriever.

I was never this brave, I was petrified of the process of pregnancy and vowed never to have babies. I cried oodles when I discovered I was pregnant for the first time because how will this baby come out of my system without labour or surgery. My parents would go as a team to get me a simple injection even though I was soon going to be a mother. I still squeeze the life out of Mr. K’s arm when I get a blood test but smile for my son if he walks past.

I don’t want my sons to be made of fears. And I have realized I don’t have the luxury of having my own. Nor does any mother. When my mother lost her cool over a family crisis I was scared, I remember my teenage heart wondered what would happen. Yet on other occasions my tigress of mother was armed to fight the night monsters with her bare arms and that made me feel secure and powerful. If she could I would be able to.

And hence I stand next to my husband knowing perfectly well that when and if he needs me I am armed with the deadliest explosives. I will fight with him shoulder to shoulder. I will be there.

My father-in-law in a discussion had asked me why I wanted to work when I was about to start a family soon, I said, “I want my children to draw power and inspiration from me. I want to set an example they should look upto. I want to work so that I am a confident mother.”

And so I am not going to let them see me scared or weak.

Yesterday there was a tiny mouse in the family room, I calmly sent the kids up to their room to sleep, and then I screamed my lungs out as I jumped up on the sofa.

Ruchira Darda

I am Ruchira Darda, a relationship coach, parenting expert, author, and entrepreneur with over 16 years of experience. Based in Mumbai, I work extensively in the areas of mindful living and emotional wellness. I am a TEDx speaker and focus on personality identification to help individuals and families build stronger, healthier relationships. I also lead and actively support initiatives such as the Lokmat MahaMarathon.