I am en route Yavatmal to bring in the Diwali festivities. It’s been a month of extreme festivities for me, beginning with the children’s birthday and now hopefully ending with the return of lord Rama to Ayodhya. Somewhere in between I fasted for longevity of my husband’s tenure on land and blessed life of my children. I am basically a hopeless romantic so the entire festival of dressing up, singing songs and dancing on the terrace, being fed the first morsel of food by my (now assured) husband forever, is a high in itself.

While I was busy dreaming about what all I was going to eat that night my firstborn decided to have a fight with me. In these moments we are of equal age, yet I have an upper hand, mom plus gender bias, so I shed out a tear and said I am hungry I haven’t eaten anything since morning. As I explained this serious concept of life changing powers of his mother to not let his dad become a star, he instantly asked me when do we fast for mummy. Awwwww !!!

I wonder why this question was never answered. Why weren’t any customs created to stop the star making process of mummas, if nothing else it would work like magic on women. It would be a dream come true to have a man woe your love every year by merely relaxing his stomach muscles for a day.

I have arrived and am sitting between marigolds and yellow daffodils, chirping birds and two strangely isolated palm trees, feminism seems to be the least of my worries until the entire clan arrives. Then it will be work mode again and the day will end with some acknowledgement of woman power.

Soon, we will be back to square one with doctors talking to Mr K about symptoms when I am the one who is suffering from life-threatening flu. There is no end to this age-old debate, change has happened and change is yet to happen. All we need is a feminist male priest to incorporate a ritual or two in memory of his beloved wife, add an assurance of lifetime of companionship and boom. This would be a Taj Mahal of all gestures, and he would become the Krishna of modern women.

In the meantime, happy Diwali, while you are pulling out the best clothes and after puja silly jokes, feed the woman of your world the first laddoo, and enjoy a No Noise Diwali and I personally assure you, definitely the coming week. wink

Ruchira Darda

I am Ruchira Darda, a relationship coach, parenting expert, author, and entrepreneur with over 16 years of experience. Based in Mumbai, I work extensively in the areas of mindful living and emotional wellness. I am a TEDx speaker and focus on personality identification to help individuals and families build stronger, healthier relationships. I also lead and actively support initiatives such as the Lokmat MahaMarathon.